Do I Really Have to Go Trick-or-Treating Again?

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October 16, 2021

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A roundup of new guidance and stories from NYT Parenting.

Golden Cosmos

A confession: One of the few pandemic changes I was happy about in 2020 was avoiding trick-or-treating. We did an outdoor candy hunt in our building's courtyard, it took 45 minutes instead of three hours, and I got to avoid schlepping around a neighborhood crowded with screaming children. As previously noted, I am a complete washout at making costumes, and because Halloween was a muted affair last year, there was less pressure to make it a Pinterest-perfect spooky szn.

This is all to say I was mildly disappointed when Dr. Anthony Fauci said: "Go out there and enjoy Halloween," because outdoor trick-or-treating is perfectly safe! Even though I am clearly a fun-hating monster, I am happy that my kids get one more piece of normalcy back in their lives, which have been so altered by Covid.

Also new this week, Claire Cain Miller asks 18 academics who study family policy: If you could choose just one benefit from the safety-net spending bill currently being debated in Congress, which would you choose? The options are: paid leave, child care, pre-K and child allowances, and the most popular response from these experts surprised me. Jason DeParle investigates why child care is so unbelievably expensive in the United States. And Tara Siegel Bernard explores a program in New York City that gives about 70,000 public school kindergarteners a college savings account with $100 already invested in it.

Lily Burana writes a funny and sweet essay about getting diagnosed with A.D.H.D. (on top of previously diagnosed depression and anxiety) after supervising her daughter's at-home learning in 2020. Finding it complicated to discuss all three of her mental health issues at once, she gives them all one name: Bruce. In homage to Springsteen, "who has been open about his own struggles with mental health. The nickname allows me to efficiently keep people apprised of my status, as in: 'Bruce has really been bringing me down this week.' The nickname helps me lighten up about my own darkness," Lily writes.

Finally, speaking of mental health, we're looking for your ideas on what to do when you take a day off work. Do you do anything that feels especially useful or restorative to recharge your mind? Share your ideas here, and they may appear in a future article.

Thanks for reading!

— Jessica Grose, columnist, NYT Parenting

THIS WEEK IN NYT PARENTING

David Dee Delgado/Getty Images

'Go out there and enjoy Halloween,' Dr. Fauci says.

Some towns have canceled celebrations, but Dr. Fauci says outdoor trick-or-treating is perfectly safe.

By Benjamin Mueller

Victor Llorente for The New York Times

October Isn't Just a Month Anymore. It's a Whole Szn.

This year, there are more seasons than ever to celebrate.

By Shane O'Neill

Mary Altaffer/Associated Press

Which of These 4 Family Policies Deserves Top Priority?

We asked 18 academics what they would choose if they could pick only one, as Senator Manchin has reportedly advised.

By Claire Cain Miller

Travis Dove for The New York Times

When Child Care Costs Twice as Much as the Mortgage

President Biden's social policy legislation aims to address a problem that weighs on many families — and the teachers and child care centers serving them.

By Jason DeParle

Jeenah Moon for The New York Times

Seeding Accounts for Kindergartners and Hoping to Grow College Graduates

New York City is giving every public school kindergartner $100 in a college savings account. Here's why every penny matters.

By Tara Siegel Bernard

Illustration by Mike McQuade; Photographs by Getty Images

My Mental Health Issues Have a Name: Bruce

And like Mr. Springsteen, I have resolved to release the shame.

By Lily Burana

Tiny Victories

Parenting can be a grind. Let's celebrate the tiny victories.

Getting our 3-year-old to peacefully leave his evening screen-time for the bath has changed 180 degrees since Mommy (or Daddy) Robot has started arriving to transport him from the living room to the bath. Tantrums quelled every time! — Allison Aab, Toronto

If you want a chance to get your Tiny Victory published, find us on Instagram @NYTparenting and use the hashtag #tinyvictories; email us; or enter your Tiny Victory at the bottom of this page. Include your full name and location. Tiny Victories may be edited for clarity and style. Your name, location and comments may be published, but your contact information will not. By submitting to us, you agree that you have read, understand and accept the Reader Submission Terms in relation to all of the content and other information you send to us.

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