Grandparents to the Rescue

May 16, 2020

A roundup of new guidance and stories from NYT Parenting.

After nearly two months of attempting to do our jobs and also educate and care for our 7- and 3-year-olds full time, the cavalry arrived last week in the form of my parents. They are helping my husband and me with kid care, and when I saw them for the first time after our respective quarantines, I cried from joy and relief. They asked my 7-year-old how distance learning was going, and she said, “It was a mess before you got here.”

This week our own Dani Blum interviewed five grandmothers about their experiences caring for their grandchildren right now. We tried to get a grandpa in the mix, but the vast majority of respondents were grandmothers. So I decided to ask my Dad, who is a retired cardiologist, what it has been like to be with his grandkids every day. “It’s been [pause, sigh] interesting,” he said. “I miss the ease of retirement. And going to work was a lot easier. But it has been really rewarding.”

Also this week, our reporter Christina Caron has a piece about how to deal with your kids fighting with their siblings all day. Melinda Wenner Moyer has guidance about how to talk to your children about illness and death during the pandemic. Aneesa Bodiat has a lovely essay about how she’s introducing religion to her kids. “I’m a Muslim woman trying to raise my children on a varied diet of faith and modernism, a halal Islamic lifestyle with a global worldview,” she wrote, which leaves room for both prayer mats and “Peppa Pig.” Finally, we have a piece from Keren Landman about the needs of kids whose siblings have disabilities. Keren grew up with a brother who has autism, and she gives excellent advice about how to make sure siblings thrive.

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We want to hear from you about workplace dynamics during this pandemic. Do you sense that your co-workers without children (or the unicorns with consistent child care) are feeling resentful, and assuming that they’re carrying a larger portion of the workload? Drop us a line here.

Thanks for reading!

— Jessica Grose, lead editor, NYT Parenting

P.S. Today’s “One Thing” comes from Michelle Christensen, a mom in Salt Lake City. Shaving cream has been “a godsend” she said. “I put my 2-year-old in the bathtub and spray half a can in there and she spends at least 20 minutes playing in it. Then I fill the tub with water and she plays for another hour or so in that.”

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THIS WEEK IN NYT PARENTING

Mar Hernández

Growing Up Alongside a Sibling With a Disability

When children help with the education of a brother or sister with special needs, the outcomes are often good for both.

By Keren Landman

Reva Fishner

For Grandparents, Filling In for Child Care Can Be ‘Wonderful and Exhausting’

As schools and day cares remain closed, some grandparents have become primary caretakers.

By Dani Blum

Lucy Jones

Prayer Mats, ‘Peppa Pig’ and Patience: How I’m Raising My Muslim Kids

Introducing the concept of God is daunting. For now, determination and a little humor will have to do.

By Aneesa Bodiat

Evan Cohen

Kids Are Grieving, Too

Parents are facing difficult moments as children confront the death of a loved one, something they may not fully understand.

By Melinda Wenner Moyer

Yann Bastard

Oh, Good, the Kids Are Fighting Again

Nobody said listening to kids bicker is fun. But lockdown offers a chance to teach them how to resolve conflicts on their own.

By Christina Caron

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Tiny Victories

Parenting can be a grind. Let’s celebrate the tiny victories.

My 3-year-old helped me clean the toilet. I later found my 5-year-old cleaning the basin ’cause she wanted to help like her brother. — Patricia Calderón, Cologne, Germany

If you want a chance to get your Tiny Victory published, find us on Instagram @NYTparenting and use the hashtag #tinyvictories; email us; or enter your Tiny Victory at the bottom of this page. Include your full name and location. Tiny Victories may be edited for clarity and style. Your name, location and comments may be published, but your contact information will not. By submitting to us, you agree that you have read, understand and accept the Reader Submission Terms in relation to all of the content and other information you send to us.

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