Praying for Child Care

May 9, 2020

A roundup of new guidance and stories from NYT Parenting.

A few weeks ago, my 3-year-old discovered that she could initiate FaceTime calls on her own. She can’t read, but she can identify the avatars of her grandparents, aunts and uncles, and her dad’s goofiest friends from a purloined iPad. At first this was mildly alarming — how long before my 3-year-old FaceTimes one of our bosses, or some rando we met once in 2007 whose number is still in our contact list? But with minor supervision we realized that we could pawn her and her big sister off on physically distant relatives for 30 minute spurts, and get a much-needed break for ourselves.

We’re not the only ones discovering the benefits of virtual babysitters, as Katharine Gammon reports in a piece for us this week. Care-taking via screen works best for kids preschool age and older, and for an hour or less. As she put it: “virtual babysitters can’t change a baby’s diapers, tuck a preschooler into bed or chase an unruly toddler around the house,” but they can give parents an uninterrupted window to get work or chores done, or at least 15 minutes to lie down and stare at Twitter.

Also this week in child care, we answer a question on most parents minds: When can I safely get in-person care again? Like many things virus-related, the answer isn’t simple. It depends on your appetite for risk, your location and the overall health of your family and your caregivers. But as families in Italy are discovering, it’s almost impossible to go back to work outside the home if normal child care is not in place.

Continue reading the main story

Maria Abi-Habib has a beautiful and uplifting story about a couple who waited years to adopt a child and were about to bring their daughter home when the coronavirus hit. Kelly Glass looks at what happens to women when maternity wards close in black neighborhoods. And Virginia Sole-Smith has a look at food-insecure families, and how they are struggling to feed their families during the pandemic.

Finally, tomorrow is Mother’s Day, and in case you missed our collection looking at how motherhood changes our minds, bodies and lives, you can take a look at it here. We hope that those of you celebrating have a glorious day, filled with love and all the special treats available.

P.S. Today’s “One Thing” comes from The New York Times Magazine, which offers tips on how to build a fort at home.

Thanks for reading!

— Jessica Grose, lead editor, NYT Parenting

Continue reading the main story

Sara Andreasson

When Can Child Care Resume?

Experts say parents should think about levels of acceptable risk, while factoring in both health and financial considerations.

How to evaluate your options

Continue reading the main story

Seth Mosier hiking in Madurai with his daughter, Selvi, in March just after India announced a lockdown on international travel.Seth and Meg Mosier

An Adoption, a Pandemic and an Evacuation

The Mosiers flew to India in March to pick up their daughter. The country locked down before they could leave.

How a new family returned home

Dr. Joi Bradshaw-Terrell provides obstetric care to the majority-black population in Chicago’s Englewood neighborhood, where three nearby maternity wards have shut down in the past year.Joshua Lott for The New York Times

When Maternity Wards in Black Neighborhoods Disappear

“Black people and our assets are sort of like sacrificial lambs of this virus.”

What experts fear

Lan Truong

‘I Know You’re Angry With Me Right Now Because You’re Hungry’

Parents in food-insecure households are stretching meals to keep their kids fed during the pandemic.

How to help hungry families

Andrea Chronopoulos

Does Online Babysitting Work?

Babysitting platforms and start-ups are scrambling to switch to screen-based child care.

What the experts say

Tiny Victories

Parenting can be a grind. Let’s celebrate the tiny victories.

I taped an old shoelace across my door frame and draped random scarves on it. My 18 month old just ran in and out of the “scarf curtain” for 15 minutes! I sat by myself in the next room. It was great.— Whitney Tu, San Francisco

If you want a chance to get your Tiny Victory published, find us on Instagram @NYTparenting and use the hashtag #tinyvictories; email us; or enter your Tiny Victory at the bottom of this page. Include your full name and location. Tiny Victories may be edited for clarity and style. Your name, location and comments may be published, but your contact information will not. By submitting to us, you agree that you have read, understand and accept the Reader Submission Terms in relation to all of the content and other information you send to us.

Continue reading the main story