Dear Parents of iPad Zombies

August 1, 2020

A roundup of new guidance and stories from NYT Parenting.

Golden Cosmos

I continue to be both amazed and alarmed by the amount of garbage content my children have consumed through their devices during quarantine. There are quick-cut video games populated by characters named “Hawaii Hank” and “Neon Angela,” and interspersed with ads for ’80s-style convertibles for L.O.L dolls. There are tween TV shows with snarky banter and many crop tops. Occasionally there are some e-books thrown in the mix, but our screen-time management has mostly gone off the rails. Things have improved since March, however, I’m not sure how we’ll get back to where we used to be before the pandemic.

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That’s why I was very grateful to read Anya Kamenetz’s piece for us this week about how to manage screen time in our current moment. Anya wrote a book called “The Art of Screen Time,” and, as she put it, in the era of hourslong Zoom classes, “‘time’ is an increasingly useless shorthand for thinking about digital devices.” Instead, she says, focus on your children’s feelings and the kind of content they’re consuming, and be kind to yourself.

This week, we have a few more pieces about school. One is by Pooja Lakshmin, M.D., a frequent NYT Parenting contributor and a psychiatrist, who gives excellent advice about how to handle your anxiety around the uncertainty going into this fall. Holly Burns looks into how to assess if your child is falling behind, and what to do if they are losing ground academically.

Also this week, Natalie Lampert has a story about why some women experiencing miscarriages have been denied surgical treatment for their pregnancy loss during the pandemic, and why it may continue to be an issue. Dani Blum talked to people participating in the “Wall of Moms” protests against police brutality across the country. And finally, Tasmiha Khan wrote about how families are celebrating Eid al-Adha this year, even at home.

Thanks for reading!

— Jessica Grose, lead editor, NYT Parenting

THIS WEEK IN NYT PARENTING

Jan Buchczik

How to Handle Anxiety Over Back-to-School Decisions

While parents may be feeling unsure about school options this fall, there are ways to feel better as you make the tough decision.

By Pooja Lakshmin

Sonia Pulido

Worried Your Kid Is Falling Behind? You’re Not Alone

As kids start school with more online learning, parents wonder whether they’ll ever catch up. Here’s how to set them up for success.

By Holly Burns

Mikyung Lee

During the Pandemic, More Women Must Miscarry at Home

Some women who sought surgical treatment for miscarriage were turned away in the spring. Experts worry it could happen again.

By Natalie Lampert

Michelle Mildenberg

I Was a Screen–Time Expert. Then the Coronavirus Happened.

An author reflects on her pre-pandemic pronouncements about children’s technology use and offers new advice, like focus on feelings, not screens.

By Anya Kamenetz

Kevin Mohatt/Reuters

‘The Moms Are Here’: ‘Wall of Moms’ Groups Mobilize Nationwide

The movement that started with a few dozen moms in Portland now has offshoots in cities across the country.

By Dani Blum

Cooper Neill for The New York Times

How Families Are Celebrating Eid al-Adha This Year

You can make the festival feel special for kids, without having to leave home.

By Tasmiha Khan

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Tiny Victories

Parenting can be a grind. Let’s celebrate the tiny victories.

After a long day at my new “desk” (aka dining-room table), I lay face down on the rug and pretended to be a surfboard for my 2.5 year old. While he walks on my back and tries to balance, he’s really functioning as a mini masseuse. Who said playtime isn’t relaxing!? — Michelle Cohlan, Brooklyn

If you want a chance to get your Tiny Victory published, find us on Instagram @NYTparenting and use the hashtag #tinyvictories; email us; or enter your Tiny Victory at the bottom of this page. Include your full name and location. Tiny Victories may be edited for clarity and style. Your name, location and comments may be published, but your contact information will not. By submitting to us, you agree that you have read, understand and accept the Reader Submission Terms in relation to all of the content and other information you send to us.

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